Saturday, April 18, 2020

CAUSE & EFFECT



AIM-AMBITION: As a child, we usually want to be whoever catches our imagination; our father or mother, a relative or cousin we fancy very much; toy maker and vendor, an ice cream vendor, our favourite animal, character from our favourite story, a superhero. As we grow older, we gradually want to become the professionals who appeal to us through their appearance and mannerisms viz. a friendly postman/courier boy, newspaper vendor or milkman, our favourite teacher, driver or pilot. We also avoid a profession we have had an unfavourable experience with a person from that profession, viz. a strict teacher, a stern nurse or doctor.
What is essential for every one of us, right from our childhood is not to lose sight of the simple truth, happiness. We all want to be at peace and be happy. It is equally important for us to know that true happiness is always based on #selfempathy(love, trust, respect) for #selflesshappiness #selflesslove.
This helps us to be curious enough to be aware of and understand our thoughts, and emotions and how to communicate them responsibly. This invariably helps to understand what our hobbies and interests are and how we can develop them into our skills, our profession to live a happy, purposeful and fulfilling life.
#integrity #beyourownvoice #beyourself
AIM-AMBITION 2: We often lose our childhood fantasy, dream and passion to become what we want to when we give in to parental and societal pressure to become someone who is a total stranger to us.children are expected to walk in parents' footsteps, get married and take up their parents' profession.
Current scenario has not changed much. often our parents tend to realise their dreams through us. They constantly remind us what is the purpose of our life; to fulfil our parents' dreams viz. study medicine, engineering, management, or government public service employment. In fact, there is no harm in becoming one, unless we too long to become so.
Parents and guardians often compare us to that of their friends, and relations. This becomes a societal pressure that parents give in to and expect us to plan and achieve a profession that the children of their friends, colleagues and relations are striving to achieve. Unwittingly they prevent us from being aware of our interest, potential and how we can happily achieve a career of our choice.
Parental and societal pressure invariably cause confusion, stress, anxiety, a frustration of failure, and unhappiness
AIM-AMBITION 3: When I remember a simple truth,
I am born alone with many other million beings.
I live alone with many other million beings.
I die alone with many other million beings.
I am alone in invisible unity with many other million beings.
In the true sense of empowerment, life's biggest thrill in the form of a challenge is in creating and defining my own life rather than living it as someone else's replica, clone or shadow. I achieve my unique existence when I fulfil all that I expect from myself. There is a paradigm shift in my definition of SUCCESS and FAILURE when I define my life as running errands to achieve what is expected of me. Then I even resort to unfair means in achieving them.

I AM TRUE TO MYSELF:
When I read the same message in the voice of a second person: "BE TRUE TO YOURSELF" I invariably transfer the responsibility of the message to the person, the one who has written the message.
When I read the message as a voice of the first person "I AM TRUE TO MYSELF" then it becomes a message for me:
I am responsible for myself
I am honest to myself
I love myself
I trust and respect myself
I care for myself
I understand myself
Hey, presto! then "BE TRUE TO YOURSELF" is synonymous to"I AM TRUE TO MYSELF".

INTEGRITY: #love #trust and #respect are the basis of #honesty or #integrity. Integrity with #selfempathy, #selflesslove and courage help us in understanding the difference in our perception and thoughts. The ability to look through and beyond the differences help us to communicate honestly with each other with the inherent ability to appreciate geographic, cultural and functional diversity as our strength.
#synergythrudiversity.
Often organisations experience communication breakdown along with frequent intra-department and inter-department conflicts. Usually, it is the lack of integrity and self-empathy in the organisation's work culture and ethos that cause such problems. When management resorts to authoritarian leadership it encourages micro-management and falls short of empowering their employees to be responsible for the decisions they make to function effectively for their and the organisation's benefit. Lack of honest communication encourages blame game, active grapevine, ego-clashes, back-stabbing, manipulation of data for personal gain and to hide individual weakness resulting in a toxic environment. Needless to say, employees indulge in office politics rather than in encouraging each other for innovative ideas to solve their problems.
#beyourownvoice #beyourself
SELFLESS LOVE: While experiencing and facing life's challenges we tend to say, "Why do I have to experience this! Had I been like that prosperous and influential person, even a honcho of the organisation I work for I would not have experienced all this! Had I been as rich as my neighbour I would have purchased a generator to beat rampant electric outage and beat the summer heat for my family at home and me!" While doing so, we overlook the fact, this negative comparison is the root cause of many of our life's adversities. Many of the problems we experience are common problems that we can solve through concerted and collaborative efforts with a positive attitude towards each other. This is the basis of #selfemapthy and #integrity that encourage us to be responsible for our actions and reaction/response thus creating a conducive environment for creative thinking and innovation. Can we say, this has resulted in the innovation and use of alternate sources of energy viz. solar, wind and even generating energy through waste and garbage?
#selfempathy is the ability to sense and understand all aspects of life. The spirit of any collaborative effort and synergy.
WIN THE OBJECTIVE WITH SELF-EMPATHY and HONESTY when the objective is CHANGE MANAGEMENT Through TRANSFORMATIONAL LEADERSHIP:
While making payment for groceries at a grocer's store I paid in cash and the cashier offered me a lozenge along with the cash memo and it was instead of a one rupee coin change to complete the sale. I asked if he would accept the same lozenge for payment of any grocery I would purchase from him in the future. He quietly replaced the lozenge with a one rupee coin.
A lady at the grocery store queried, "Why all this fuss. I would have accepted the lozenge." I asked her, would she accept a packet of lozenge instead of the money I would have borrowed from her. She hummed while reflecting over the imaginary proposition.
Similarly, the leadership and management of any organisation should encourage #integrity( #love, #trust and #respect) along with #selfempathy in their functions and in relationship with their employees so that their employees will establish a similar relationship with their customer through honest communication based on self-empathy and integrity.
#beyourownvoice #beyourself #selfawareness #organisationawareness #socialawareness #socialimpact #leadership #malpractice #miscommunication #leadershipdevelopmentcoaching #transformationalleadership
APPROACH to SUCCESS and FAILURE in achieving a goal or a purpose vary from the perspective of an individual and a group based on personal and collective perception. For instance, individuals and a group's collective effort in gaining happiness may not be the same unless it is formulated on ethical norms to sustain everyone's integrity.
While reading a news update on Fire at Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris I remembered a young hostel mate from Chandannagar, West Bengal
Way back in 1997, when I was working in Calcutta as a Business Executive with NIIT Limited I lived in a working women's hostel. My hostel mate Sharmistha Pal, a fresh graduate, in her early twenties, had just begun her career as a web designer. I am an alumnus of St, Joseph's Convent, Chandannagar. Sharmistha Pal would often sarcastically remark, "Sunipa di, there is no short cut to success!" One day, I asked why she said so. She merely smirked in response.to which I asked, "Then, is there a short cut to failure?" Henceforth, she refrained from making the same remark.
The inherent questions:
1. Are we born to fail when death is our inevitable result?
2. Is success more important than participation?
Live life with integrity
#skillsforlife #beyourownvoice #beyourself #integrity
We often unwittingly lie when someone asks us
"HOW ARE YOU?"
We are taught to respond to such a question as
"I AM OK, FINE, GREAT, GOOD...THANK YOU!"
Therefore, it has become mechanical civility to inquire about a person's well-being expecting an equally cordial reply.
Instead, we can #empathise to break the stereotype and encourage an animated and candid conversation with simple honest queries viz.
it's been a long time since we last met. Currently what the person is doing. To show you are genuinely concerned about the person's weil-being you can pick up a few of the salient points of your last communication making the person feel comfortable enough to share his joy and worries with you. Feel safe enough to discuss his problems, because, by simply #listening and trying to #understand the person we often help him unburden himself.
Through #compassionate #listening we become the means enabling the person to speak aloud and listen to himself, and while doing so, often the prson finds solutions to his problems.
Two different images with the same message appealed to me, coz, in terms of humanity, they enhance the spirit of the message:
#integrity = #love #trust #respect
#beyourownvoice #beyourself #mindfulness #ethics 

AMBIGUITY OF WORDS: We often read a requirement in a job description: Job applicant should have the ability to work in an environment of ambiguous communication. Ambiguity due to geo-cultural along with socio-economic diversity: "Can you ride/drive a team?"
We tend to enjoy such ambiguity in the form of memes, gossips, jokes, false news and even S.N.S. algorithms.
We develop our creative ability to design and develop products and services to such social ambiguity viz. Art of communicating with a certain sect, or community. The fashion statement of a community; unwritten dress code viz. colour and style of clothes.
Often, this ambiguity in the form of #miscommunication based on #assumption challenges us when it tends to tread over the boundaries of physical rationality of #integrity( #love #trust #respect) #ethics and #pragmatism causing #stress #aggression and #conflict.
When we don't take anyone or anything for granted; we seek & consent initiate any work, endeavour or enterprise; we practice free, responsible and clear communication at all functional levels; then we are #compassionately #curious #convinced #courageous to #know #understand & resolve challenges of BEING WITH A TEAM/THE WORLD.
#beyourownvoice #beyourself #culturalawareness #languagebarrier #socialimpact

APOLOGY: A word with a negative reaction for a simple reason, how we were introduced to the word: Our parents, teachers or elders asking, rather forcing us to apologise for our mistake, instead of helping us to reasonably realise the negative repercussions of a wilful mistake or otherwise. Why they did so? Simply because they too were introduced to the word in the same way.
We invariably practice the same method of seeking or thrusting apology upon each other: Wilfully wrong a person and apologise feigning innocence. We often find ourselves apologising for mistakes we did not commit or apologising just because of ourselves being a stickler to our principles and our respect for regulations; that invariably enables people to manipulate us in achieving their selfish gains leaving us to do the bit called "To Apologise".
Conflicts at the workplace, at home, often have the conflicting teams and people demand an apology from one another; or try to escape further confrontation by "falsely apologising". In doing so, we invariably misuse the word "apology". CURIOUS? https://sunipa.wordpress.com/…/…/15/i-want-you-to-apologize/

WHAT IS IT? YES OR NO? Yes, there is a difference between the two and a no, because apology qualifies the sense of regret one feels by being sorry.
Putting it in simple words, "I am sorry!" expresses a person's sense of regret to someone's hurt or painful condition. Someone's frustration of being underemployed and eventually unemployed for a long time. When the person realises he/she is the cause of someone's hurt and misery and wants to express it then uses the phrase "I apologise!"
AM I TRYING TO CONVINCE MYSELF?
When I write, sketch, doodle; dabble with musical notes, or spices of culinary art; model wood, clay or metal carvings; spin and weave patterns; make a video of or film a fact, an incidence or my own narrative.
When I imagine and creatively make it into a reality or I comprehend the relevance and magnanimity of reality to creatively document it to posterity...
am I doing all this to convince myself?
#skillsforlife #selfawareness #organisationawareness #socialawareness #organisationimpact #socialimpact #creativethinking #ethics #integrity #perception #skillsforlife #sustainability #mindfulness. So, #beyourself #beyourownvoice
#leadership #change #situationalawareness #transformationalleadership
We strive for peace and ironically our effort for peace often results in conflict not only with our own self but also with those we perceive to be the cause of our stress, anxiety and negativity. When we consider anyone to be the cause of our sorrow we need to introspect with empathy to truthfully analyse and understand the cause of our stress. This can help us to overlook our own fallacies and defy the truth by blaming someone, an external factor or entity to be the cause. We should not ignore the fact we are all directly or indirectly connected to one another. When we share each other's joy and sorrow we invariably achieve the peace and harmony.
DON'T ARGUE!
We often experience this form of one-way communication in autocratic/authoritarian leadership. A "task"(using this word in lieu of "work" or "assignment") is assigned from the boss to subordinate without any threadbare discussion on the execution of the task. The person executing the task avoids taking ownership of the task and expects his boss to take any blame to address any complaint on its execution.
This eventually results in a chain of blame game where everyone in the functional hierarchy blames each other for any failure in the proper execution of the task.
This spawns a toxic work environment and culture where people consider any mistake a sin. They do not miss any opportunity to point out to each other's mistake and use it for self-aggrandisement. People use negative comparison and manipulation of team opinion to gain recognition of their function than on the basis of their capabilities and attitude towards their functional responsibilities, organisation, its people, stakeholders and clients. #selfawareness #organisationawareness #socialawareness #organisationimpact #socialimpact #creativethinking #ethics #integrity #perception #sustainability #mindfulness. #beyourself #beyourownvoice
#leadership #change #situationalawareness #transformationalleadership

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Tuesday, February 18, 2020

AN ORDINARY HUMAN'S EXPERIENCE OF "TEMPORARY INSANITY DAY (FEBRUARY 16, 2020)" IN D-MART IN TILAKWADI AREA OF BELGAUM:


#beyourself #beyourownvoice
AN ORDINARY HUMAN'S EXPERIENCE OF "TEMPORARY INSANITY DAY (FEBRUARY 16, 2020)" IN D-MART IN TILAKWADI AREA OF BELGAUM: 😂🤣😅🙃🙂😌🙂❣️

 Last Sunday, we drove to D-Mart located inTilakwadi area of Belgaum city. The highway in front of the building housing the departmental store is dug up for fly-over construction to decongest vehicular traffic at the railway level crossing gate number three making it difficult to park our vehicle in D-Mart's subterranean parking lot and had to park the car at the road near the building(inset photograph).
There was a curtained kiosk at the entrance to security check ladies/women shoppers. The lady security guard quite diligently pressed my pelvis and buttocks as part of a security check that made me wonder why she did not press my chest/breasts as part of the process.
D-Mart in Tilakwadi area is notorious for bottom pinchers and bottom brushers, who do the commercial meme creators huge favour by making people the women/ladies in particular as a "BADASS!" I, therefore, was aware of my cousin-sister's, Mother's and Aunt's discomfort in shopping at D-Mart. L.O.L.!!!! 
My cousin, Joshika Gupta was relieved of missing out on being graced with "ignoble touch". While she was paying for the purchases (Pani Puri mix, Pani Puri Water mix and a couple of packets of Tang.) I slowly made my way through a non-operational POS area. Just then, a store attendant left his post at one of the POS moving swiftly towards me brush past me touching my right arm, and his hand touched my right lap. I turned around and tapped him on his shoulder. He turned around and sheepishly blurted out "Sorry!"
 I replied to him, "I did not tap on your "Shoulder" in demand an apology, but to tell you never do anything disrespectful. Gentleman, do not deliberately disrespect anyone and invariably disrespect yourself."

Once my cousin and I had cleared the security at the exit and were walking towards the make-shift vehicle parking area, she suggested we have Pani Puris from a Pani-Puri vendor "parked" on the pavement. My Aunt and cousin-sister like Pani-Puris very much and whenever they see a Pani_Puri road-side vendor they always make a beeline towards it. My Aunt and cousin stood to the right of the vendor's Pani-Puri stand while I stood to the left with my back to the afternoon sun for a while till Aunt urged me to be with them. While the young Pani Puri vendor was busy preparing to serve us I asked him whether the street lights lit in the evening. He said "No". I reiterated my question only to receive the same reply with the explanation that the street lights did not work because of fly-overs' construction work. I explained to him that the construction work could not and should not hamper street lighting and they should be aware of it. Just then his elder brother hurried to the stand and asked his younger brother to hand him over the plastic glove he was trying on. In the flurry, they damaged the glove and still used it. Meanwhile, a group of young ladies had joined us to the left of the stand enjoying their chatter while waiting for Pani Puris. At elder brother's behest, the younger sibling moved to the left of the stand to take onions from a container and chop them. He was grinning from ear-to-ear as he approached the side of the stand and deliberately brushed his arm on my stomach before I could move away from his way. He grabbed the knife and onion and looking at me with the grin still stuck on his face he stood behind us to do his brother's bidding. I saw him looking at the girls while peeling the onion. 
I asked him whether he could read and write. He shook his head in affirmative and hung his head so low that it literally touched his chest. I simply told him and his brother, if we are literate and ignore reading to be aware of our rights and responsibilities as a human, a national, a citizen and above all as a literate individual then, we allow ourselves to be exploited and make it a valid reason to exploit and abuse anyone else. We give vent to our frustration through hooliganism and then justify it as a backlash to abuse and exploitation. We become the oppressed and the oppressors too. Its example is the blatant misuse of media and social networks. Both the brothers and the group of young ladies stood silently rooted in their place. I earnestly hope I did not ruin their celebration of "TEMPORARY INSANITY DAY!"
My experience of Kalyan, Maharashtra, and Belgaum has made me wonder whether there are "two groups of masses":
1. ONE: who is obsessed with chest and breasts and never miss an opportunity to ignobly touch that part of your anatomy when they walk past you or are standing in front of you.
2. TWO: who is obsessed with the pelvic region of your anatomy and never misses a chance to touch you there.
We, misconstrue self-discipline to be a straight-jacketed existence of abstinence; dignity to arrogance and humility to be timidly passive. This happens when parents, teachers and senior members of human society ignore the fact that they are responsible for the youngsters to be aware of the biological changes and sexual urges and how they are to responsibly respond their queries and not manipulate them to their selfish gains resulting in immorality and social hypocrisy. We are invariably responsible not only for the strength of our character but also of others if we firmly believe in yours and mine instead of ours..."Our World...Our Planet Earth."  For evidence, look at all the memes and viral posts in social networks.
I am not a "NATIVE" of Karnataka state of India. I may be part of the so-called "migrant population" like the two brothers earning their livelihood selling Pani-Puris from their road-side vending stand eventually becoming a cynosure to the NATIVES giving an opportunity to the law enforcers to fleece them for allowing them to use the pavement to earn their living if they are not skilled enough to formal employment: sweating it out at a sweatshop like restaurant, road-side dhaba, construction site, retail outlet, workshop or an industry. The constant hammering of one's existence in a social milieu to be more of a bane than a blessing invariably triggers them to act in defiance to such innuendoes both overt or introvert. This invariably exhibits the fact: "WE ARE LIVING IN A PARADOXICAL VICIOUS CIRCLE: EVERYONE IS A VICTIM: OPPRESSOR IS THE OPPRESSED!"

Should we not introspectively question the reason why mega and metro cities and towns have immigrant populations? Should we try to delve deep within us using our #compassion #education #respect #ethics #wisdom #rationality with full awareness of #sustainability #diveristy #resilience and sans #bias #prejudice
Be generous with your comments and thoughts on this post.
THANK YOU! for giving your precious time to read it. 🛐☮️✝️☪️🕉🌳🍀❣️


Source of D-Mart, Belgaum's Image: https://www.justdial.com/photos/d-mart-belgaum-belgaum-supermarkets-eav78aqsx1-pc-131259884-sco-992uqa6y2qe
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Thursday, February 13, 2020

माँ, तुमने मुझे क्यों पैदा किया... !


कुंठित भावनाओं के अंधड़ ने
मचा रखी थी उथल पुथल  मन में।
हर लम्हा दिलाता बीते दिनों की याद-
उन कटु अनुभवों का विशाद,
जो जख्मों को कुरेदती थीं हर बार।
बेबसी और हताशा के भंवर से
नहीं मिल रही थी निजात।
मानों जी रही थी दोहरी ज़िन्दगी:
अपने एहसास, अपनी अनुभूति,
अपनी उपलब्धी, उसके थे ही नहीं।
यह सब थीं मात्र मरीचिका।
हर कोशिश में नाकामयाबी
जैसे उसके भाग्य में था लिखा।
सिस्कियाँ  झकझोर रही थी उसका
 हताशा से बोझिल तन और मन।
चेहरे को हाथों से ढककर
रो पड़ी फफक फ़फ़ककर।
तभी महसूस किया हाथों पर
 माँ के हाथों का स्पर्श:
समय और मेहनत से जीर्ण होने पर भी
बहुत स्नेहशील और कोमल थे माँ के कर।
देखा नहीं माँ की ओर सिर उठाकर।
आंसूंओं के बांध को रोकने की
माँ ने  कोशिश की निरंतर:
उसके चेहरे पर से हाथों को हटाकर।
घुटनों को समेटकर और
उसमे चेहरे को छुपाकर,
माँ के प्रयास को किया निरर्थक।
"बेटे , क्यों कर रही है जुर्म अपने आपपर?
क्यों आघात कर रही है आत्मविश्वास पर ?
क्यों कुंठित हो रही है पढ़ लिखकर ?
क्या मिल रहा है खुद को कष्ट देकर!"
बिलख पड़ी माँ की बात सुनकर।
"माँ , क्यों कहती हो मुझे बेटा?
हमेशा बेटा-बेटी में फर्क है किआ।
मर्यादा की दुधारी तलवार से
मुझपर हमेशा वार किया।
जाने अनजाने जिससे भी होती गलती
उन सबका हर्जाना मैं ही भर्ती।
तुम्हारी पसंद-नापसंद को
हमेशा किया स्वीकार।
मुझे क्या पसंद है,
क्या हैं मेरे अरमान,
कभी नहीं जान पाई
मैं अपने ही  विचार:
मानों अपनी ज़िन्दगी को
सँवारने का मुझको ही
नहीं था कोई अधिकार।
ना कर सकती थी प्रश्न
करने कोई संशय का निवारण;
बड़ों के आदेश का करना पालन,
खुद से छोटों की गलतिओं की
जिम्मेदारी खुद पर ले लेना-
यही  है मेरा धर्म महान।
हमेशा तुम टोक देती हो -
कि मेरा बचपन बीता है
औरों के से भी खुशगवार।
बचपन से ही यही समझाया
पढ़ लिखकर गृहस्थी की
जिम्मेदारी ही है सरमाया।
जब हम  सब पर छाया
विषम परिथितियाँ का अँधेरा,
तब तुम्हारी बात न सुनकर
मैंने यही मनाया-
तब की मैंने की चाकरी,
भरसक कोशिश की
आर्थिक सम्बल होने की।
कोशिश हमेशा यही रही
कि मर्यादा ना लांघूँ कभी:
 रेंगती रही, रौंदी गयी,
पर स्वाभिमानी  बनी रही।
नश्वर कामयाबी के लिए
कभी भी नहीं किया
अपने सिद्धांतों से समझौता;
पर तुम सबने उठाया
उसका भरसक फायदा।
छोटे भाइयों बहनों ने
जब तोड़े मर्यादाओं के बंधन,
उन्होंने अपना पराया समझा
मेरे जैसे नहीं किआ
अपने आपको स्वाह
रख सौहार्द और शांति
को सर्वोपरि बारम्बार।
वे तुम्हारे लिए हुए
दुनियादारी समझने वाले
और मैं तुम सबकी हुई
अभिमानी, जिद्दी और उन्माद!
 वे हो गए हैं बड़े
और मैं हो गई छोटी।
लोगों और  तुम  सबने
उठाया पूरा  फायदा
मेरी नेकदिली का।
झेला पाखण्ड लोगों का।
जब भी मैं कोशिश करती
करने अन्याय के विरूद्ध प्रतिवाद,
माँ , तुम मुझे खामोश
कर देती हर बार,
यह कहकर कि-
'बिगड़ी बनती नहीं,
ऐसे  ज़िन्दगी संवारती नहीं।'
पर इस विश्वास के साथ
मैंने किआ अपना ही तिरस्कार।
देखती रही अपने आत्मसम्मान और
स्वाभिमान को होते तार तार कई बार।
समझा खून के रिश्ते
होते हैं सबसे दुखदाई:
तुम जीते हो यादों को।
तुम दोहराते हो बीते दिनों को।
तुम पनपते हो द्वेष पर।
तुम्हारा दृढ विश्वास है
बदला लेने पर;
क्यों कि, ऊँच नीच का
भेद भाव सहज करते हैं
पूरा करने निहित स्वार्थ।
तुम आसानी से करते हो
लोगों का इस्तेमाल
करने अपना मकसद पूरा
करने अपने काम आसान।
नियमों से जकड़ते तुम हो।
उन नियमों का उलंघन
करते  तुम ही हो।
फिर कहते हो जीना सीखो।
ज़िन्दगी के मज़े लेना सीखो।
महसूस की तुम सबकी अनैतिकता
कैसे पनपते हो दूसरों की
कमजोरिओं और दोष पर।
कैसे थोपते हो तुम अपने
व्यभिचार और चिंताओं को
बेझिझक मुझपर...
मैं घुलती रहती हूँ
अपने को दोषी मानकर।
इंसानों की लालसा,
इंसानों की हवस,
इंसानों का दंभ,
इंसानों के सत्ता का लोभ,
इंसानी फितरत जीतने की,
इंसानी फितरत दमन करने की,
इंसानी फितरत प्रतिशोध की,
इंसानों की हैवानियत,
इंसानों का पाखंड,
इंसानों का भ्रष्टाचार,
इंसानो का व्यभिचार,
इंसानों का दोगलापन।
इंसानों का निर्लज्ज व्यंग,
इंसानों का विषाक्त तंज,
क्या है यह इंसानी फितरत:
मर्यादा की लकीरों के बीच
वह ढूंढता है अपनी हर सोच
हर भावना, हर हरकत,
हर कोशिश, हर अंजाम
का प्रत्यक्ष और परोक्ष अर्थ।
मेरी सकारत्मक कोशिशों
पर तुम सबने जमाया हक़।
जब मैं अपनी ज़िन्दगी की
विडम्बनाओं से बोझिल हो
अपनी ज़िन्दगी की कहानी को
ख़त्म करने की कोशिश की,
तुम्हें उसे निरर्थक करने में
बड़ी कामयाबी मिली,
और मुझे मिली तुम्हारी
उल्हना और ममता बनावटी।
तुम्हें मेरी ज़िन्दगी की नहीं
अपनी बदनामी का था डर।
माँ, मुझे जाने देती मर।
क्यों यह सोच :
'लोग क्या कहेंगे ...!'
क्यों मुझे दुःखों से
आज़ाद होने से दिया रोक!
जी रही हूँ ज़िन्दगी मौत से बदतर।
गर यही है मेरी किस्मत का लिखा
मैं हूँ एक जिन्दा लाश की तरह।
माँ, तुमने मुझे क्यों पैदा किआ ... !"
यह अर्तनाद कर अनायास
उसने देखा अपनी माँ की ओर।
उसने झाँका माँ के मन की गहराई में
और देखा उनमें दुःखों के लाल डोर।
अपने प्रश्न और उसमें छुपे दर्द का
माँ के मन की गहराई में
 दिखी अपनी ही परछाँई।
महसूस की वही घुटन,
और अपनी तन्हाई।
दोहरी ज़िन्दगी की घुटन;
सामाजिक विडम्बनाओं के बंधन।
सामाजिक बंधनों से जकड़ी हुई से
सभी आशा करते संवेदनशीलता;
पर उसके दुःख और कष्ट पर
किसी का दिल नहीं पसीजता।
उसने माँ की आँखों में देखा
पराधीन जीवन की बेबसी,
उसने माँ की आँखों मेँ देखा
देश  के विभाजन से जुडी
खौफनाक यादें- कही अनकही।
उससे उत्पन्न शंका, आत्मसंशय,
हीन भावना, पलायनवादिता;
जीवन की चुनौतिओं से जूझते हुए
नफरत और निराशा से जकड़ा हुआ मन।
नकारातमक भावनाओं से जूझता हुआ मन।
इस अँधिआरे में छुपी उसे दिखी
आशा की एक टिमटिमाती  किरण,
जो निराशा के अंधड़ से बचनेका
कर रही थी निरंतर प्रयत्न।
उसने आँखों को कर बंद 
याद की माँ की ज़िन्दगी:
कैसे बार बार आशियाना 
उजड़ने पर भी उसने हार नहीं मानी।
पति और बेटी ही हुए उसकी ज़िंदगानी।
बेटी को  ज़िन्दगी के अंधे गर्त
और बेरहम थपेड़ों से बचाना चाहा।
उतना ही संस्कारों और मर्यादाओं को
मानकर जीने की जद्दो जहद में
अपनी बेटी को अनैतिकता और
व्यभिचार से त्रस्त होते देखा।
लोगों को उसकी सरलता का
असीम फायदा उठाते देखा।
नहीं जानती थी उसकी बेटी
भेद-भाव, उंच-नीच और हिंसा।
ज़िन्दगी उसके लिए नहीं थी
कोई खेल या प्रतिस्पर्धा।
निश्छल, निस्वार्थ और सद्भावना
के रिश्तों में थी उसकी आस्था।
वह नहीं सीखा पायी अपनी बेटी को
इस बेरहम दुनिया में जीना।
बेटी उसकी परेशानी का सबब
बनकर रहे वह चाहती कभी ना।
बेटी के हमउम्र जी रहे थे ज़िन्दगी
होकर कामयाब और खुशहाल।
माँ का मन ना चाहते हुए भी
बेटी की तुलना कर बैठती
उसके भाई-बहनों और
उसके हमउम्रों के साथ।
"तुम्हारी दीदी की चिंता
मुझे सताती है बार बार।
गर्त में है उसका वर्तमान,
उसका भविष्य है अंधकार।
यही डर सताता है कि
क्या होगा उसका
मेरे जाने के बाद। "
मन ही मन वह मानती थी
संवेदना की आड़ में
उसने जो ज्यादतियाँ की थी
अपनी बेटी के साथ:
जिन परिजनो और लोगों से
था उसका वैमनस्य
बेटी को आंका था उनके साथ
और वैसा ही किआ था बर्ताव।
कुचल डाला था उसका व्यक्तित्व।
भ्रमित किया था उसका अस्तित्व।
ना चाहते हुए भी उसने
अपनी संतान  के आत्मसम्मान पर
उसकी सत्यनिष्ठा पर
और उसके आत्मविश्वास पर
 किआ था प्रहार कई बार।
"माँ, तुमने मुझसे किया वैरों सा व्यवहार।
मेरे छोटे भाई बहनों ने किआ तुम्हारा विरोध;
यह कैसा तुम्हारा विचार: तुमने दी उन्हें मान्यता
और मेरा किआ हमेशा तिरस्कार !
माना कि सदभावना के लिए हमारा चोला बदला
पर उसके परिणाम ने किआ जग जाहिर
निहित स्वार्थ ही था मकसद तुम्हारा,
इंसानियत और संवेदना नहीं थे तुम्हारे विचार।
अपने स्वार्थ के लिए मेरे व्यक्तित्व को रौंद दिया
माँ, तुमने मुझे क्यों पैदा किआ ... !"
माँ रही बेबाक, अश्रु का बाँध टूटा आज।
निःशब्द अपने हाथों में लिआ बेटी का हाथ।
थमाया उसने एक कागज़ उसने रखा था
उसे संजोकर और पढ़ा था कई बार।
उसमें बेटी ने लिखे थे पिता के और अपने विचार,
जो था माँ को उनकी तरफ से जन्मदिन का उपहार। 
आंसुओं से भीगे हाथों से कागज़ को थामा
और सिसकियों से कांपती आवाज़
में पढ़ने लगी पिता और अपने संवाद
जिसका मर्म उस कागज़ पर था लिखा,
जिसे माँ ने याद दिला दिया था आज:
"नहीं बनो किसीका प्रतिबिम्ब।
नहीं करो किसीकी अंधी भक्ति।
तुलना करना भी है निशानी कमज़ोरी की।
अपने को पहचानो, अपनी पहचान बनाओ
यही है हमारी सच्ची ज़िंदगानी।
कामयाबी-नाकामयाबी निशानी हैं इस कोशिश की;
यह नहीं हैं मंज़िल, बस पड़ाव हैं ज़िन्दगी के सफर में।
ज़िन्दगी के जद्दोजहद में कितनों की मदद की;
जिन्होंने साथ दिया, जिन्होंने सहारा दिया,
क्या उनको प्रकट किआ आभार अपना,
और उनके मुसीबत में उनका साथ दिआ ?
गलती सभी ही करते हैं
पर उनसे सीखकर ज़िंदगी को बेहतरीन जीने की
कोशिश करने का इरादा करते हैं ?
ज़िन्दगी है चंद लम्हों की
क्या उसे दूसरों की निंदा
और आलोचना में ज़ाया करते हैं ?
संवारें अपनी ज़िन्दगी तो अपने
और बेगानों की भी संवर जाएगी। 
बिगाड़ोगे अपनी ज़िन्दगी तो
यह दूसरों के ही काम आएगी।
अपने लिए तो सभी जीते हैं।
परायों का भी हमदर्द बन जीकर देखो,
ज़िन्दगी और बदरंगी ना दिख पायेगी।
निहित स्वार्थ के लिए दूसरों का सहारा लेना
है कमज़ोरों की निशानी।
कामयाबी के लिए सिद्धांतों से समझौता करना
है  कमज़ोरों की निशानी।
दूसरों की कमज़ोरी का फायदा उठाना
है कमज़ोरों की निशानी।
ज़माना बेरहम नहीं, बल्कि -
हमारे स्वार्थ , भेद-भाव, ईर्ष्या,हवस
से इसे हमबनाते हैं बेरहम।
 शोषण के खिलाफ
हिंसक बगावत भी है
अपना और औरों का दमन।
ज़िन्दगी की सबसे बड़ी चुनौती है
जैसा निश्छल मन ले हम आए धरती पर
मन को वैसे ही निश्छल रख पाएं आखिरी सांस तक।
गम मत करो गर लोग तुम्हें बनाते हैं
जरिया उनकी कामयाबी का,
उनकी महत्वाकांक्षाओं को
पूरा  करने का।
वे ना मानते हुए भी लोहा मानते हैं
तुम्हारी काबलियत का।
ऐसे लोग और चुनौतियाँ ज़िन्दगी की
पहचान कराती हैं तुम्हारी काबलियतों की।
जान और ईमान है पूँजी तुम्हारी।
इन्हे सहेजकर जीना
है तुम्हारी ज़िम्मेदारी।
हम सब ही हैं अपने दुःखों से दुःखी।
जब समझ पाएं आपस के दुःखों को,
तो संवर जाएगी हम सबकी ज़िन्दगी।
प्रेम, सम्मान और अमन -शांति
कभी दावे या बल से नहीं मिलतीं।
जितनी इन्हें सदाचार से दोगे
मिलेगी उससे ज़्यादा ही;
जैसे ज्ञान और मौलिक सुख
बाँटनेसे होती है उनकी वृद्धि।
हम धरती से हैं, धरती हमसे है नहीं।
हमारे जीवन का सहारा है यही:
इसे हम रौंदते, काटते और बांटते हैं
इसका नश्वर मोल आंकते हैं
इसपर घरौंदे और राष्ट्र की सरहदें बांधते हैं।
इस पर हक़ ज़माने के लिए हथियार भी उठाते हैं।
हम एक दूसरे को यह जताते हैं :
तुम हमारा दिया खाते हो ,
हम  तुम्हारा दिया खाते हैं।
तुम हमारी दया पे जीते हो,
हम तुम्हारी दया पर जीते हैं।
इस दाम्भिक स्वामित्व के उन्माद में हम भूल जाते हैं
इस धरती से जन्मे हैं हम, इसी में विलीन हो जायेंगे।
जिस भी रूप में जन्मे हों
कैसे बिताया अपना जीवन
यह बताते हैं हमारे कर्म:
कैसा रहा हमारा व्यवहार
वनस्पति और प्राणियों के साथ।
कैसे प्रयोग किआ
धरती के प्राकृतिक धरोहर को
बिना किए उसका नाश।
मांगी स्वाधीन ज़िन्दगी
तो क्या निभाई अपनी जिम्मेवारी ?
क्या औरों की भी सुनी,
तब अपनी भी  सुनाई?
माना हम अकेले आए हैं
और अकेले चले जायेंगे।
जान, जिसका ना है कोई मोल
क्या दी उसे सकारात्मकता,
या नाकारात्मकता से घोंट दिया
उसको, उसकी सोच और उसके बोल ?
कितनो की ज़िन्दगी संवरी ,
कितनों को बर्बाद किआ।
कैसे जी हमने अपनी ज़िन्दगी
यह वक़्त की रेत पर हमारे पग चिन्ह
और समय की धारा यह बताएगी।"





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Wednesday, February 5, 2020

COLOUR

"Happy Birthday Nihaar! are we on time for your birthday bash?" Mohan and Roshan chimed together when their friend answered the doorbell by slowly opening the door and cautiously peering from behind it.
"Hey, you guys are here! come in, I'll go and get rid of this towel....you guys! do you know? I rushed out of the bath wondering who was at the door ringing the bell as if the devil has taken him...!
Nihaar, a dark and slim young man who was celebrating his twenty-fifth birthday today, rushed from behind the door into his room tightening his grip on the bath towel he had hurriedly wrapped around his waist. He shook his head sprinkling water from his closely cropped hair as he closed the bathroom door behind him. His friends closely followed him into his bedroom and made themselves comfortable on the bed.
Mohan and Roshan were not only Nihaar's childhood friends but also his school and college mates. Now the three of them were working in the same private firm. The three friends hailed from a small town close to the city which was now their place of work. The young bachelors lived in a rented apartment.
Roshan was a jovial young man who loved to enjoy life. He was stalky and apparently had not got rid of his baby fat. He lived to eat and spent considerable time watching movies and closely following fashion trends. He was an active social networker.
Mohan was a handsome lad who was aware of his attractive appearance and loved to work out at a gym after spending the entire day at the office. He used to enjoy the attention and admiring glances of women. His colleagues and even his friends Roshan and Nihar used to call him a flirt and enjoyed stories of his pass time romances.
Unlike Roshan and Mohan Nihaar was thoroughly grooved into the traditional and conservative lifestyle and was solely responsible for keeping the flat spick and span. He was not a spendthrift like his friends. Roshan and Mohan were the only friends he had.
"Hey Rosh, here is the gift for Nihaar." Mohan pulled out a box neatly wrapped with a colorful gift wrapper and satin ribbon.
"What's it, man?" Roshan asked looking at Mohan place the gift on the bed.
Mohan winked at him and replied "Wait! let our old boy open his birthday gift!"
"Where are his teammates Chetan, Neha, Sandra, and Rafiq? Hope Nihaar did not see them standing right behind us when he opened the door for us? " Roshan, who was lazily lounging on the bed, pulled himself out of the bed and rushed to the living room.
"Just chill Roshan, they are hiding in the living room and kitchen. Sandra and Neha are in the kitchen for sure. They had the cake box, drinks and food packets with them. Relax yaar! you will ruin our surprise party man!" Mohan said. Just then Nihaar stepped out of the bathroom looking as fresh as a daisy in a new set of kurta and pajamas, a birthday gift from his parents.
"Guys, what's up? where are you planning to go and what is this?" Nihaar said as Roshan and Mohan literally dragged him into the living room along with the gift.
On seeing the trio emerge from the bedroom, their office colleagues jumped out of their hiding places yelling and singing "Surprise! Birthday Boy! Happy Birthday to you.....sss!"
They all got together pushed the settee, plastic chairs and tables from the center of the room. Rolled out mats and placed cushions while Chetan put on the music system. Neha and Sandra rushed to the kitchen along with Roshan and Rafiq to get the trays full of snacks and drinks.
Once everyone had comfortably settled down on the floor to enjoy the birthday party, Chetan and Mohan handed the gift to Nihaar who curiously looked at it and asked "What is this, guys? Why all this trouble..."
Roshan, who was equally eager to see the gift helped Nihaar unwrap it saying "Don't ask Nihaar, just open the gift and see..."Both Roshan and Nihaar looked dumbfounded at the gift. Nihaar, after staring at the gift for a while looked at Roshan and then at Mohan and said " A doormat?!" He stood up holding the doormat in front of him as if to show it to everyone in the room. It was a green color rubber doormat with the word "WELCOME" written in red on one side and "HOME SWEET HOME" written in blue on the other side. The mat was framed on all four sides in black.
Nihaar looked pale and shocked. He blurted out "How can I use it!"
Chetan, who worked with Nihaar in the account's department pulled Nihaar down by his hand making him sit beside him on the floor pushed a glass of cold drink in his hand and asked "What's wrong with the doormat Nihaar? why you cannot use it?" Rafiq, Sandra, and Neha were as perplexed as Chetan on the way Nihaar had reacted to the gift.
Before Nihaar could say anything Roshan and Mohan were in splits of laughter "We'll answer your question, Chetan" they said trying to control their laughter.
Mohan gulped down the cold drink and wiped his mouth as if trying to control his laughter "Guys, do you know what Roshan and my favorite colors are?"
"No. What are they and what's that got to do with the gift?" It was Sandra and Neha's turn to question him.
Mohan eased his back on the settee that was right behind him and said "My favorite colors are green and blue. Roshan likes red and black."
Rafiq looking a little at ease asked: "Okay Mohan, those are your and Roshan's favorites, but what's that got to do with the doormat?"
Roshan, who was now able to put two and two together replied, "Rafiq, my friend,  do you remember, last year when we had joined work Amazon was very much in news and it was you who had drawn our attention to the news you had first spotted on a social networking site?"
It was now Rafiq's turn to recall a news snippet "Had it anything to do with any doormat?"
"Bingo!" Chetan yelled in sheer excitement. Amazon had doormats with the Indian flag in its online product catalog in some country that I can't recall now! Oh yes! I remember! with all the brouhaha....no! it is correct...flags should not be on doormats...Rafiq, you had said so while you read out the news snippet to us. But what has that got to do with this doormat?"
Nihaar, who had remained disturbingly silent all this while blurted out "Guys, just let it be! I thank you for the gift, but I will not use it. Please don't insist!"
Chetan, who was seated next to Nihaar looked at him quizzically before he shifted his gaze to Mohan who was on the other side of Nihaar gazing intently at Chetan. Mohan smiled at Chetan and lifted his glass of cold drink and with great aplomb announced "I raise a toast to my friend Nihaar, I drink to his health and happiness. Cheers!" and gulped down the drink. He then resumed his speech " Friends, we had a tuition master who taught the three of us together after school in Nihaar's home. For any small mistake, he used to hammer the daylight out of us. We were so scared of him and loathed him so much that we bought a black and white doormat that we placed at the entrance of the study room and also a black and white football to play with during free time. Black and white were our tuition teacher's favorite colors. We used to give vent to our anger for the teacher on those two harmless objects."
"Hey! we do that in the office!" Sandra looking quite excited sat up and continued talking "during tea and coffee break we often discuss our bad experience with our clients, colleagues, and bosses and often angrily crush the empty paper cups. Strange! I have noticed it now! hahaha!" The rest of them joined her in laughter.
Mohan cleared his throat drawing everyone's attention to him and said "Guys, you all know our boss, Mr. Bhupesh, the Marketing Head and how he traumatizes us with stiff and steep sales targets? A couple of months ago he had asked the Admin Department to replace the doormat in front of his office room. We knew his favorite colors are red, blue, brown and yellow. You all must have noticed the color of the ties he wears to the office? Oh yes! We asked the Admin to get a doormat of those specific colors. Now with the new doormat in front of his office room's door, you will see him avoid stepping on it or tread carefully on it, while we wilfully stomp and trample the poor doormat after a bad sales review session with him!" Mohan then placed the empty glass on the floor and looked at Nihaar sitting next to him, who was still holding the doormat in his hands and looking at it. Nihaar sensing Mohan's gaze at him looked at Mohan and asked "But why did you guys buy a doormat of your favorite colors? You are my childhood buddies and you both are so dear to me! How could you do this to us!"
Roshan, who was helping Neha refill empty glasses with cold-drink and pass on the snacks trays replied: "For a change dear buddy, for a change."
Neha, who had remained silent all this while stood up and said, "Guys, time to get the birthday cake for the birthday boy! His favorite yellow pineapple, pink strawberry, white vanilla, and brown chocolate cake! Let him blow the candles make a wish before he cuts his favorite colored and flavored cake. How's that...!"
When you step on me,
When you jump off me,
When you hop on me,
When you trample me,
When you kick me,
When you touch me,
When you stand on me,
when you say you "own" me,
When you treat me with ignominy,
Intending to keep your feet clean-
When you use me,
You accept I am part of the Earth integrally.
You accept I am part of you, integrally.
We are part of the Earth integrally.
Your dignity can't be my ignominy.
Your self-worth is how you treat me.
We are worthy of one another,
We are worthy of our integrity.
For, we are worthy children of Mother Earth.
Our purpose, our worth is 
In sustaining the Earth's ecology.
We are responsible for 
The Earth's environment's sustainability.







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Saturday, February 1, 2020

बूझो तो जानें - IV


मैं हूँ एक आग का गोला। 
मेरे कारण  होता है 
पृथ्वी पर अँधेरा और उजाला। 
चंदा जो मंडराता पृथ्वी के इर्द गिर्द 
पृथ्वी पर करता मेरी रौशनी को अवलोकित। 
पंच तत्वों में से एक मै हूँ। 
नव ग्रहों का आधार मैं हूँ। 
अनगिनत तारों में से एक मैं हूँ। 
पृथ्वी एक वर्ष में पूरा करती मेरी परिक्रमा। 
 एक वर्ष में अनुभव करते हर एक मौसम सुहाना:
सर्दी में मैं सदा नम रहता हूँ, 
ठण्ड के मज़े लेने देता हूँ। 
वसंत ऋतू आने पर -
वसंत पंचमी के साथ 
गुलाबी सर्द का अनुभव करवाता हूँ। 
गर्मी में मैं अँगारे बरसाता हूँ ;
मेरी तपन से पड़ता सूखा और आकाल, 
तब पृथ्वी और उसके  प्राणिओं को 
जल की जीवन दायिनी शक्ति का
 मैं एहसास कराता हूँ हर पल।  
जब मेरे सामने आता है
घना पर्दा बादलों का;
तब तुम करते बारिशों का 
बड़ी ही बेसब्री से इंतज़ार। 
उसका सहर्ष  स्वागत करते,
जब आती बारिश की जीवन दायिनी फुहार।
उसी फुहार से डर जाते हो
जब वह हो जाती है प्रलयंकारी बाढ़ !
जैसे ही पृथ्वी ज़रा झुकती है
अपने निर्धारित पथ पर
तो साथ ले आती है पतझड़:
किसान काटते अपने मेहनत की फसल।
तुम्हारे लिए यह है मौसम त्योहारों का।
दशहरे का , और दीवाली का।
कब यह मौसम शीत में जाता है बदल।
जब पड़ती है कड़ाके की ठण्ड,
तब  मनाते हो तुम वर्ष की सबसे लम्बी रात,
और बड़े दिन का त्यौहार।
पृथ्वी करती हवा की चादर ओढ़
मेरी हानिकारक किरणों से
अपना और सभी प्राणिओं का बचाव।
तुम्हारे नश्वर सुख के लोभी प्रयत्नों से
करते उस वायुमंडलीय चादर में सुराख़,
तब तुम पृथ्वी और उसके पर्यावरण का
करते हो पृथ्वी और तुम सबका सदा के लिए नुक्सान।
पर, जब तुम करते हो करते हो
मेरी जीवनदायिनी ऊर्जा का
मानवता के हित में निरंतर प्रयोग;
तुम पृथ्वी और उसके पर्यवरण का
करते हो सम्मानपूर्वक उपयोग।
तुम त्योहारों और तिथिओं के लिए
मुझ पर आधारित पंचांग देखते हो।
विज्ञान में मेरे विषय में पढ़ते हो।
आदि मानव हो या मानव सभ्यता:
शासक हो या उसकी प्रजा;
प्रजातंत्र, गणतंत्र या सर्वोपरी मानवता,
प्राणी मात्र मुझे अपने उत्स के रूप में है जानता।
पृथ्वी के गर्भ में हूँ सदैव विराजमान। 
                                                     तुम अब बूझो तो जानें क्या है मेरा नाम। 










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